donovisms

i will tell you all about our family vacation, but first i have to tell you something i told mommy that she thought was funny. i had jotted down a few of my more recent donovisms, but somehow they became missing, which totally sucks(a word i do say).

i mentioned that i am not allowed to talk about how people look. especially if they are fat. especially if they are fat and mommy. well, sometimes i forget. so, i looked up mommy's shirt--it WAS after dinner, so give me a break--and it looked.....like she had eaten a big dinner. so i said, "WHOA MOMMY! YOU.....(this is where i catch myself)...had a big dinner so i just want to make sure your tummy isn't getting ripped out of your skin because then there will be blood and then you'll die. " and that was where i was smart enough to tell the old fat broad that i was worried and i loved her, hug hug. i don't think she caught on to my almost saying what i almost said.

also, i am officially going to preschool this year--next week--and i know it is because i know things like this: said to mommy when asking for a glass of tonic water with lime. no gin, no vodka, just tonic, ice and a slice of lime. just like mommy drinks it. she gives it to me because she can't figure out if it is soda and i am not allowed to have soda unless someone like aunt tiff gives it to me. but me and mommy, we looove our tonic and lime. so i explained to her that "tonic water is good for me because it has a lot of protein in it. and the protein goes into the cells in your blood and takes out the old protein. then the old protein goes out in your poop, so that is why i want tonic water." look, you just can't argue with science. that is the key to getting your way--especially as a kid---prove your point. defend your argument. who doesn't want the bad protein to be wisked away out of the potty.

did i really not post about out Family Vacation? seriously? another time. the hiking... the fishing... the river....the campfires, man it was fun.

i got to spend a weekend without mom and dad recently, which was pretty cool. unca jas and aunt tiff came to my house and spent the weekend while mommy and daddy went away on a romantic grown-up trip without me. i offered to come, but they said no. i had fun with them. but i can't post tooo much about it because one of you readers might be a spy and tell mommy what we did and what we ate and all that. we had a good time, let judt lave it at that. and yes, there as some drinking. it was one lousy sprite and i handled it just fine.